Sunday, September 12, 2010

The Meaty Bites diet

The Meaty Bites Diet   

I've  got  2 dogs. I bought a large bag of Meaty Bites at Coles and was   standing in line at the check-out.

A woman behind me asked  if I had a dog.

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again, although I probably shouldn't  because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 25kgs before I woke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of  most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

I told her that  it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is  to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or  two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally  complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention  here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled  with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.  

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that  condition because I had been poisoned by the food.
I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the middle of the road  licking my dick and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered  out the door.

Stupid bitch...why else would I buy dog  food??

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