Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Subject: FW: CHINESE SICK LEAVE... [SEC=UNCLASSIFIED
Hung Chow calls his work and says,
'Hey, I no come wok today, I really sick . Got headache, stomach ache and legs hurt, I no come wok.'
The boss says, 'You know something, Hung Chow, I really need you today.
When I feel sick like you do, I go to my wife and tell her to give me Sex.
That Makes everything better and I go to work. You try that.
Two hours later Hung Chow calls again.
'I do what You say and I feel Great. I be at wok soon........You got nice house'.
Subject: FW: 1978-2010Subject:FW: 1978-2010This should be sent only to those whose level of maturity qualifies them to relate to it...
1978: Long hair
2010: Longing for hair 1978: KEG
1978 : Acid rock
2010: Acid reflux
1978: Moving to California because it's cool
2010: Moving to Arizona because it's warm
1978: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
2010: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor
1978: Seeds and stems
1978: Hoping for a BMW
2010: Hoping for a BM
1978: Going to a new, hip joint
2010: Receiving a new hip joint
1978: Rolling Stones
2010: Kidney Stones
1978: Screw the system
2010: Upgrade the system
1978: Parents begging you to get your hair cut
2010: Children begging you to get their heads shaved
1978: Passing the drivers' test
2010: Passing the vision test
Just in case you weren't feeling too old today, this will certainly change things. Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of this year's incoming freshmen. Here's this year's list: The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born in 1992.
They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.
Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.
The CD was introduced 2 years before they were born.
They have always had an answering machine.
They have always had cable.
They cannot fathom not having a remote control..
Jay Leno has always been on the Tonight Show.
Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.
They can't imagine what hard contact lenses are.
They don't know who Mork was or where he was from.
They never heard: "Where's the Beef?", "I'd walk a mile for a Camel", or "de plane, Boss, de plane.."
They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.
McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
They don't have a clue how to use a typewriter.
Do you feel old yet? Pass this on to the other old fogies on your list. Notice the larger type, that's for those of you who have trouble reading..
So have a nice day!!!!! It is good to have friends who know about these things and are still alive and kicking!!!!