Friday, August 6, 2010

Ocean as seen by children (funny answers)

Subject:

FW: Ocean as seen by children

Children Writing About the Ocean...

   

                                             

 1)  - This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles.   (Kelly,  age  6)                                                                

                                                                                 2) - Oysters' balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age  6)                       

                                                                                3) - If you are surrounded by ocean, you are an island.  If you don't    
have ocean all round you, you are incontinent.   (, age  7)                
 
                                                                               
4) - Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily       
Richardson. She's not my friend any more.   (Kylie, age   6)                     
                                                           

                                                                                 5) - A  dolphin breaths through an asshole on the top of its head.  (Billy, age  8)                                                                

                                                                                 6) - My  uncle goes out in his boat with 2 other men and a woman and pots 
and comes back with crabs.  (Millie, age  6)              
                   

                                                                                7) - When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the 
ocean.  Sometimes when the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to  
make the wind come.  My brother said they would have been better off      
eating beans.  (William,   age 7)                                             
 
                                                                               
8) -  Mermaids live in the ocean. I like mermaids.  They are beautiful and 
I like their shiny tails, but how on earth do mermaids get  pregnant?     
Like, really?    (Helen, age 6)                                              
 
                                                                               
9) - I'm not going to write about the ocean. My baby  brother is always  
crying, my Dad keeps yelling at my Mom, and my big sister has just got    
pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy, age  6)                     
 
                                                                               
10) - Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting.   Electric eels can   
give you a shock.  They have to live in caves under the sea where I think 
they have to plug themselves in to chargers.                               
(Christopher, age   7)                                                         
                                                                             
   
11) - When you go swimming in the ocean, it is very cold, and it makes   
my willy small.   (Kevin, age 6)                                
              

                                                                                 12)  -  Divers have to be safe when they go under the water.   Divers can't 
go down alone, so they have to go down on each other.  (Becky, age   8)   
 
                                                                               
13) - On vacation my Mom went water skiing. She fell off when she was    
going very fast.   She says she won't do it again because water fired      
right up her big fat ass..  (Julie, age 7)                                  
 
                                                                               
14)  -  The ocean is made up of water and fish.  Why the fish don't drown  
I  don't know.   (Bobby, age 6)   
                                            

                                                                                 15) - My dad  was a sailor on the ocean. He knows all about the ocean.    
What he doesn't know is why he quit being a sailor and married my mom.     
(James, age 7)      

                                                          
 
                                                                               
 
If you didn't  smile at one of these, you need to find a better sense of humor.

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