Monday, November 22, 2010

look up an open drain!!!! (pics)


Begin forwarded message:

PLEASE READ FIRST
Florida Power & Light crew putting in lines for an addition to the  Orlando   International   Airport  found the following in a culvert they were using.   

See  the two (2) pictures  below: 

  

  

  
 

  

   
 
The gator is/was 18' 2’ long.  The rattlesnake roundup totalled 87.  
We thank Florida Power & Light for sharing these pictures. 


Mr Andrew Johnson


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Saturday, November 20, 2010

The history of the middle finger

 

I never knew this before, and now that I know it, I feel compelled to send it on to my more intelligent friends in the hope that they, too, will feel edified.  Isn't history more fun when you know something about it?  Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory over the English, proposed to cut off the middle finger of all captured English soldiers.   Without the middle finger it would be impossible to draw the renowned English longbow and therefore they would be incapable of fighting in the future. This famous English longbow was made of the native English Yew tree, and the act of drawing the longbow was known as 'plucking the yew' (or 'pluck yew').

Much to the bewilderment of the French, the English won a major upset and began mocking the French by waving their middle fingers at the defeated French, saying, See, we can still pluck yew!   Since 'pluck yew' is rather difficult to say, the difficult consonant cluster at the beginning has gradually changed to a labiodentals fricative F', and thus the words often used in conjunction with the one-finger-salute!   It is also because of the pheasant feathers on the arrows used with the longbow that the symbolic gesture is known as 'giving the bird.'

IT IS STILL AN APPROPRIATE SALUTE TO THE FRENCH TODAY!

And yew thought yew knew every plucking thing

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Thursday, November 18, 2010

DE-STRESS

 

De-stress

Click here to download:
cid:0FF18240A7434FC6B693705A2B8ADC0A@FlemingPC (51 KB)


A man was weeding his garden and
accidentally cut off the tail of their cat which was hiding in the grass.

The cat was rushed  along with the tail, over to Myer.


Why Myer??????


HELLOOOOOOOOO?

Myer
is the largest re-tailer in

Australia 

Click here to download:
cid:DB4D197B080D4B4B9DD07E1C4F4D84C1@FlemingPC (81 KB)

Click here to download:
cid:DBAECFD2556142849D84940DD7EC924E@FlemingPC (63 KB)

Click here to download:
cid:BC164A10ADB54A22A20BC613943AE046@FlemingPC (23 KB)

Click here to download:
cid:CEE6000C491240FC90C35DF32296AE7B@FlemingPC (57 KB)

   

Click here to download:
cid:6504CF8E90A445A5A72AF0CF8CAD892F@FlemingPC (244 KB)

TO ALL MY 'NUTTY' FRIENDS....

Have a fabulous STRESS-FREE day!!!!


 

 

Posted via email from andjoh's posterous

The Gas Company was more than likely BOC. Outstanding $0.00 Pay Up!!!


This happened to me with a Telstra bill. I took it to the Post Office and Tim behind the counter had never seen such a thing. It wouldn't accept the barcode scan as it has a minimal of $0.05 so I asked him if he could just put a stamp on it and held it as evidence if anything else was to follow which never did. 


Account idiots! -True Story!

On Thursday, 24th January 2002 , Derek Guille broadcast this story on his afternoon program on ABC radio.

In March 1999 a man living in Kandos (near Mudgee in NSW, Australia ) received a bill for his as yet unused gas line stating that he owed $0.00.

He ignored it and threw it away.  In April he received another bill and threw that one away too.

The following month the gas company sent him a very nasty note stating that they  were going to cancel his gas line if he didn't send them $0..00 by return mail.

He called them, talked to them, and they said it was a computer error and they would take care of it.

The following month he decided that it was about time that he tried out the troublesome gas line figuring that if there was usage on the account it would put an end to this ridiculous predicament.

However, when he went to use the gas, it had been cut off.

He called the gas company who apologised for the computer error once again and said that they would take care of it.  The next day he got a bill for $0.00 stating that payment was now overdue.

Assuming that having spoken to them the previous day the latest bill was yet another mistake, he ignored it, trusting that the company would be as good as their word and sort the problem out.

The next month he got a bill for $0.00. This bill also stated that he had 10 days to pay his account or the company would have to take steps to recover the debt.

Finally, giving in, he thought he would beat the gas company at their own game and mailed them a cheque for $0.00.  The computer duly processed his account and returned a statement to the effect that he now owed the gas company nothing at all.

A week later, the manager of the Mudgee branch of the Westpac Banking Corporation called our hapless friend and asked him what he was doing writing cheque for $0.00.

After a lengthy explanation the bank manager replied that the $0.00 cheque had caused their cheque processing software to fail.  The bank could therefore not process ANY cheques they had received from ANY of their customers that day because the cheque for $0.00 had caused the computer to crash.

The following month the man received a letter from the gas company claiming that his cheque had bounced and that he now owed them $0.00 and unless he sent a cheque by return mail they would take immediate steps to recover the debt.

At this point, the man decided to file a debt harassment claim against the gas company.  It took him nearly two hours to convince the clerks at the local courthouse that he was not joking.

They subsequently helped him in the drafting of statements which were considered substantive evidence of the aggravation and difficulties he had been forced to endure during this debacle.

The matter was heard in the Magistrate's Court in Mudgee and the outcome was this:

The gas company was ordered to:

[1]  Immediately rectify their computerised accounts system or Show cause, within 10 days, why the matter should not be referred to a higher court for consideration under Company Law.

[2]  Pay the bank dishonour fees incurred by the man.

[3]  Pay the bank dishonour fees incurred by all the Westpac clients whose cheques had been bounced on the day our friend's had been processed.

[4]  Pay the claimant's court costs; and

[5]  Pay the claimant a total of $1500 per month for the 5 month period March to July inclusive as compensation for the aggravation they had caused their client to suffer.

And all this over $0.00.

This story can also be viewed on the ABC website.

Who employs these idiots??

Remember, these "people" walk among us and breathe the same air we do.  What is worse , they breed !

This is a true story.




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So how did that happen? Animals in situations pics